addictions

"Addiction is the hallmark of every infatuation-based love story. It all begins when the object of your adoration bestows upon you a heady,hallucinogenic dose of something you never even dared to admit that you wanted- an emotional speedball, perhaps, of thunderous love and roiling excitement. Soon you start craving that intense attention, with the hungry obsession of any junkie. When the drug is withheld, you promptly turn sick, crazy and depleted (not to mention resentful of the dealer who encouraged this addiction in the first place but who now refuses to pony up the good stuff anymore- despite the fact that you know he has it hidden somewhere, goddam it, because he used to give it to you for free). Next stage finds you skinny and shaking in a corner, certain only that you would sell your soul or rob your neighbours just to have that thing one more time. Meanwhile, the object of your adoration has now become repulsed by you. He looks at you like you're someone he's never met before, much less someone he once loved with high passion. The irony is, you can hardly blame him. I mean, check yourself out. You're a pathetic mess, unrecognizable even to your own eyes.

So thats it. You have now reached infatuation's final destination - the complete and merciless devaluation of self".

-Elizabeth Gilbert


Sent from my iPhone

the doctor has left the building

ده مفيش فرحان في الدنيا زي الفرحان بنجااااحه





Sent from my iPhone

fairytales

Amongst the many many random conversation that happen during the OT between me and my partners (in crime ;p), somehow we ended up discussing this song.



Do you remember this???

I couldn’t even wait till i even got home that day. I connected to youtube, and had the song blasting off my car for the next 3 days 6 days till now ;p

And from there, one related video took me to the next



And the next



And the next



And the next



And the next



and the next



The next thing i knew, i spent the weekend all curled up infront of the TV with the VCR (ee imagine! shakhbary ;p), spending hours and hours recollecting my childhood memories one Disney movie at a time...

I guess this comment just summed up how i felt :(

Whatever happened to fairytales?








Apparently, Disney has stopped making fairytale movies until further notice after Tangled and The princess and the Frog. They found that most of the people who went to see those were people in their 20s (ie me ;p) and not kids like before. They found that kids are now more interested in Hannah Montana and you know...other lame characters whose names i don’t know (twin kids of hotel, brunette who is a witch, fat dude living in the white house). Kids now are more interested in being cool and sexy and what not, rather than fairytales...our kids now are too óld’ for fairytales (unlike us who are still looking for our prince charming because we grew up believing this crap lol)

But you know, that doesn’t bother me as much as does the fact ena there’s no more innocence in Disney movies. It’s always about getting the girl oo having a girlfriend oo they’re all kissing here and there chenna el3eed. This never happened before in Disney movies, and if it did, it was always KNOWN ena hatha shay ghala6 oo mo 6abe3y like now. Remember? Dayman the kiss we saw in Disney movies was in the last scene where they get married and live happily ever after.And always the guy would aim to make the girl his wife, not his girlfriend.

It scares me to know the kind of values and standards kids nowadays are growing up to.

But, until then, ill go back to living in my fairytale land :)







And my personal favourite



and one last one...for the little kids inside of us who still believe in magic :)

'


~ to nostalgia and fairytales...


ps: writing this post took a good 4 hours out of my life...it was so difficult deciding what to include and what not to ;p


pps: i'm smiling and clapping like an idiot as i watch each video before adding it...its 2am lol


ppps: i'm going to bed very happy tonight :)

happiness

I complain about way too many things.

Too much studying drains me, and too little makes me feel empty. Too much hospital work exhausts me, and too little bores me. My group, my family, my bros, the traffic, too little holidays, too much holidays....

Even the weather...its too hot its too cold...its like nothing ever pleases me.

While i admit thats its only healthy to whine about some things, i've also noticed that this pessimistic sort of approach to things is draining...to say the least. All its been doing to me is simply adding on to my negative energy and to my already stressful life.

So, the other day, while i was having a conversation with someone i havent heard from in a while, and he asked me how i've been, i found myself answering with no hesitation "i've been good el7amdellah. Uni is good. Family is good. Everything is okay, i guess", and after i paused for a few seconds to contemplate what i've just said, "i'm happy" i added.

And while i was met with silence on the other end, i continued " el7amdella theres nothing more i can ask for. I dont think life can get any better than this".

I think just taking that moment out of my life to just contemplate that thought has made me realize that everything else just seems so petty and tiny and just...irrelevant...when you think of the big picture.

And by the big picture i mean people who dont have a country to call home, fathers who would kill to feed their starving children, people who are sick and in constant pain...and more or less the lack of the sense of security and the hopelessness that comes with or without it.

Security is a very precious gift.
As is hope.

And i think as long as i have those two, i will be able to sleep at night. I will remain happy :)

"3asa doum" my long-lost friend on the phone said. I asked him "Are you happy?". He sighed and mumbled a few what-ifs amd maybes. Never gave me a straight answer.

Since then, i've been asking alot of people this question...and the variety of replies i've been getting has been adding alot of perspective to things.

So i ask you to take a moment and think about it yourself.

Are you happy with your life?

~ to happiness

Sent from my iPhone

23

A rainy day

A new hospital

A crappy movie

A not-so-great start

But definetly a night to remember ;)

HAPPY 23!!

I wish myself graduation this year!

(though running into him here or there won't be too bad either ;) *crosses her fingers*)


Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone from Zain Kuwait

resuscitation

Road Traffic Accident.

Unstable patient in shock.
Barely existent pulse.
Unconscious.
Bleeding from every orifice.
Multiple fractures.

Order blood.
Order ABG.
Order CBC.

WAIN EL ANESTHETIST!!!
WAIN EL ULTRASONOGRAPHIST!!!
ABY BLOOD!! WAIN ELBLOOD!!

He will need a bed bl ICU. Zahbaw bed bl ICU.

He's hypotensive.
He's tachycardic.
He's bradycardic.


Are we losing him?

Wetha we lose him?
Wetha we don't?

We're not losing him.

But what about the guy we lost last oncall? And the guy who developed a permenant disability from the oncall before it? And the woman who lost a limb from the oncall before it? And the child with head injury from the oncall before it?


If you think 2010 treated you badly (like I did), think about their 2010.


"Ah, make the most of what we yet may spend,
Before we too into the Dust descend;
Dust into Dust, and under Dust to lie
Sans Wine, sans Song, sans Singer, and - sans End!"


~ blogging from the resuscitation room, wishing you all a 2011 full of health and happiness :)


Sent from my BlackBerry® smartphone from Zain Kuwait